Tuesday, March 2, 2010

The Storm

Life is funny sometimes, the way everything works out. If you can manage to make it through the storm, there always seems to be a bright shiny rainbow waiting for you on the other side. Sometimes the storm is short, but sometimes it seems to last forever. For me, the storm came in just after I returned from my college graduation trip to Europe. With London on the brain and sunny San Diego weather outside my door, the storm seemed more like a snow day where I had no responsibility and got to play all day! What a great concept right?!! Wrong. The joy of having nothing to do all day quickly faded as my college friends went back to school and I realized I was the only one with nothing to do. This was when the damage from the storm really started to appear. I stayed in bed all day, job hunting and playing Farmville while the rest of the world around me went about their day. I no longer had a reason to get dressed or leave the house, so I stayed in my pajamas all day long, sleeping till noon and frequently taking naps. I was officially depressed. I cried almost every day and lost the desire to socialize. A few interviews came and went without the prospects of a job to follow. I began to doubt myself and my ability to succeed in life. The only things keeping me sane were my amazing friends that surrounded me. So when I got an interview for a job back up north I was horrified that I might get an offer and have to move away from my support system. The week after my interview while I waited for their response, I tried to psyche myself up for making the move. A change of scenery could be good, right?? Sure I wouldn't have any friends, and I wouldn't be working around people my age, but at least I could catch up on my reading and start working out again… It wouldn't be all bad. Despite my best efforts, I still cried when I got the call that I was being offered the position. And again when I told my parents. And again every time after that when I even mentioned the move. A week later I was packing and reserving a U-Haul truck.

Leaving San Diego was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I get teary eyed just thinking about the day I left. Of course I waited until I was on the road alone to bawl my eyes out. I got home and quickly prepared myself for work the following week. Living at home with my parents again, I missed the freedoms I had when living on my own in San Diego. I felt like I was always being watched and couldn't really act completely like myself. I had to filter myself in a way. And I was miserable without my friends. They would all call me when they were out, telling me how much they missed me and how much they wished I was there. Gee thanks guys but if you hadn't noticed, I wish I was there too!! And hearing everything that I'm missing out on isn't helping me at all!! Rude! Lol. I know they meant well :)

But then the first day of work started. I picked out my outfit the night before, and my dad ironed it for me. (I'm not spoiled. I'm well taken care of hahaha!!) The first day of work is NOT like the first day of school. Everyone was so welcoming and friendly!! And I was so happy to finally have a reason to get out of bed; a reason to change out of my PJ's and leave the house. Sure, my job may get boring at times. I mean, I do stare at a database all day long. But it had finally "stopped raining," and the storm was starting to clear. (I put that in quotations because it has been raining up here constantly lol.) My dad said that 2010 would be my year. And I can finally see why. I have an amazing job at an amazing law firm with amazing people. I do have friends from college that live up here now and I have been able to go out with them on the weekends. Living at home has actually been great (minus when the cat tried to eat my hamster) and my parents have been extremely supportive and helpful. Unfortunately, I will have to start ironing my own work clothes though because I just moved into my own studio apartment in a beautiful community close to work! I talk to my favorite people (yes Donny, Nikki and Leann, that would be you) all the time and San Diego is just a short one-hour flight away. I am very happy and very grateful for how everything has seemed to work out. Without the storm I had to endure, I may have been resentful of moving up here for work. Heck, I may have been like all those people who complain about going to work on Facebook every day. But instead, I am excited about having to go to work every day. I appreciate being one of the lucky ones who is no longer unemployed and do not take that for granted. In an economy such as ours, every day we work should seem like a blessing because there are so many out there who are not lucky enough to have an income at all.

Its funny how life works out sometimes. You can go through a horrible storm that seems to have no end in sight. But if you are strong enough to come out the other side, everything seems to look a little bit brighter than it did before the rain.

Until next time with more Random Thoughts From the Shower, this is KRS signing off J